Today I wanted to tell you some of your favorite things! At (almost) three weeks old, you love to be swaddled (especially by your Daddy, who I affectionately call the swaddle master!). You love to be skin-to-skin with anyone (you especially love the feel of your face against someone else’s face when they are holding you!); you love lying on Mama’s chest, skin-to-skin, after nursing, too. In fact, you often fall asleep on Mama’s chest in the middle of the night and in the early morning hours! You like to sit in the Boppy pillow, and you sleep curled up in the Boppy every morning after Daddy goes to work. You love it when Mama sings to you when you’re sleepy, and you love your little giraffe nightlight in your room.
Mama gave you a bath this afternoon, and for the second time this week, you didn’t cry during bath time! YAY for progress!
When you woke up at 5AM(ish) this morning, I took you into Mama and Daddy’s room to nurse you. It was early in the morning, and Mama was a bit sleepy, so, like other mornings, I reached for my cell phone to surf the Internet to keep me awake while you nursed. Yet this morning, you looked up at Mama for a brief moment while nursing. You stared at me, right in the eyes. When you looked up at me with your sweet blue (for now!) eyes, I put my cell phone away and stared right back at you. In that moment, I realized that these sweet moments with you, these early morning moments when you’re so little, are so fleeting, and that I need to take each and every opportunity to appreciate these moments.
I read a quote this morning about new motherhood, and it’s stuck with me: “New motherhood is everything they say it will be: wonderful, maddening, heart-breaking and beautiful.” I’ve had so many wonderful and beautiful moments with you in the past three weeks since your birth, L, and I’ve had a few maddening and heart-breaking moments, too. But the most amazing thing is this: motherhood is filling up holes inside of me that I didn’t even know that I had, and I feel so blessed to have each and every moment with you, no matter how stressful or wonderful, precisely because the heart-breaking part of motherhood is that it’s fleeting. I love you so much, little man, and I feel so blessed to be your Mama.
Lots of love,